Dear Cody,
I loved being a witness of your life this weekend. We were able to visit Philadelphia, the city that saw you learn what it’s like to live in the “big city” away from your small town in Arkansas. You are social, so you didn’t have an issue making friends. But it was your involvement in the Drexel Smart House that really helped you become who you are – a loyal leader, an incredible thinker, a good friend.
We started dating when you assumed the role of President in this organization that hopes to create an example of sustainable living for others. We spent hours on Skype not really talking, just typing away – me, at my AP U.S. History homework, and you discussing with your best friend Patrick your latest “politicking” plan to get your ideas in front of the University’s President (because that’s the person you are: Go straight to the top.. sheep skin just isn’t your style). I swear there’s nothing more attractive than a man who goes after what he wants, but makes sure he is being kind, ethical, and overall gracious on his way there. There’s also nothing like seeing you when you’re in your element, leading a community of thinkers towards a common goal (and challenging them to imagine even bigger goals while they’re at it). The way you infuse your humor into intelligence is also quite wonderful. I roll my eyes, but you and I both know I secretly adore you for it. Life would be so boring without you.
So when you were back in your element, laughing hard with friends who are quickly becoming some of my best, I couldn’t help but realize how badly I want your eyes to shine just as brightly when you’re home in Chicago, too. This trip was the first time I heard one of your beloved mentors, Joan, admit how upset she (and many others were) when they heard of your decision to leave Pennsylvania for a girl. You know I’ve often felt guilty for taking you away from Arkansas in case you wanted to be with your family, and I have struggled with not feeling guilty for taking you away from your friends, too.
But then I realized listening to you talk about your own childhood desires this morning on our way to work that it’s not “taking you away” from something as much as it is a “running towards” a life with me in it. And boy, do I feel lucky.
I suppose the point of this random love letter is that I had a chance to really see you this weekend. And what I saw especially was how your eyes danced when you were back in that place of leadership, where the memory of crashing high-profile meetings as a student is not actually that far away.
But I think it’s time for you to make new memories. Take bigger risks. Keep dreaming. Solidify those relationships and build a team of mentors, colleagues, and friends that will get you through the valleys and celebrate with you when you reach those peaks. You are a man full of potential and goodness and love. I am honored to be your wife and will be your rubber ducky whenever you need me to be. Besides, if we’re ever in a rut because you followed my advice, well, now we have it in writing. I’ll stand by you no matter what.
I love you more with each passing day. I am already so proud of you. Now go do big things.
Love,
Ania
